So Dem Tull

All dem mein hawen wun cuppa f’ dems smoko wen So∙Dem∙Tull arsa dem:

“Yorlye gut yuse powa bill yet?”

Moos orl dem mein nort sey get dems bill.

“I gut mine en I larna yu, I nor hapi.”

“Wuthen gwen orn So?”

“Waal, semes a theng. Wi nor payen salan f’ riid orl abowt en read aklans meta, but we still hat f’ pay f’ get it read. Dar nor mek sens. If dar komputa meshuren aklans powa orl d’ taim, en orl dem hat f’ du es push a button, fuut wi payen seven dollars furret?”

“Dars wun guud point myse maet. I kinda worried I nor bin gut mine now. Bin lorng taim sinse meana hawe et. En dar neks wun se muusa ya.”

“Dars nort d’ ooni theng yorlye nort noh bowt. Gut wun daily charj of 56 cents a day. Dars ‘bowt anada fifty dollars dem meana kollekt frum aklan eaj bill. En, ef yu gut solar, yu el pay nada 56 cents eacj day f’ the privilej of tryen f save muny. Trewly, I struggle f’ sii wi es bata orf!”

“Miwurd, So. Wuthen yuse powa bill semes?”

“Waal, I larnen yu rait now, I nor gwen bi able to afford f’ sit ya ewry dai laik I bin du. I kinda sorry for yorlye kos yu gwen get three at a taim, by d’ taim dar gel sey finish.”

“Wuthen yu torken bowt So? Yu noh sumthen orl aklan nort noh?”

“Shor du. I bin ya dar gel so far behind, yorlye gwen ooni ketj et kum Oktober! Good luk orl aklan!”

To this comment, there was a chorus of “Dunna stolley!”, “Dar kaa bi es truu!” and “Shorly yu debargenan?!”

So∙Dem∙Tul lean bak en his chair en tull, “Es truu ess da bible, so dem tull!”