Grief

Grief is a normal, often healthy, response to the loss of someone close, a family member, partner, friend, or neighbour. We grieve for people we don’t know, when we lose a job, get divorced, or lose our identities. Grief can involve many emotions, extreme sadness, shock and anger, numbness, and denial. Grief affects us all differently, within the individual between morning and night, some people grieve openly, others prefer to keep to themselves. Importantly, there is no right or wrong way to express grief, there is no time limit on grief, grief can be a way to make sense out of the unbearable.

Grief can be overwhelming and debilitating, can make us feel hopeless, empty, guilty and lonely. For many of us, dealing with grief makes it impossible to think about anything else, grief can be painful and constant, everybody responds to grief differently.

Prolonged grief (also referred to as complex or complicated grief) is a persistent form of intense grief where people find it very difficult to live with loss. Instead of gradually thinking more positively, thoughts may become stuck in a dark, sorrowful place. Some people may describe this time as being emotionally paralysed and unable to think past the grief and loss. They may feel very lost and alone. In this state, it is common to feel confused, feel a sense of overwhelming sadness, have more extreme thoughts and behaviours, which may or may not be linked to the experience, and have an ongoing longing for the past.

If you are worried about someone close to you, get in touch and be available to spend time together. Respect that your friend may need to cry, hug, talk, be silent or be alone. Remember that we all need to process our own grief in our own way, what feels right and normal for you, doesn’t mean it is right for anyone else. As with most things in life, it is impossible to understand what someone else is going through. If you need help, call NIHRACS on 22091, there are a range of resources, both in person, and through telehealth that are available.

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health

https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/grief-loss

Our next skill drill will be held on Tuesday, 11 March, at the St John Shed, Grassy Road. Start time is 18:30, we aim to finish by 20:00.

If you are interested in becoming a St John volunteer or, for more information, please email norfolk.island@stjohnnsw.com.au or james.garden@stjohnnsw.com.au